Qui-Gon Jinn

Mon, 30 Jan 2006 03:51:46 GMT

The mission was a success. And utterly exhausting. People in general are just so tiring to deal with. Now all I have to do is write up my report and submit it to the Council, and hopefully I'll be left alone for a while. But first I feel the need to ... thaw out. Maybe later I'll catch up on what I've missed around the Temple. There have been peculiar things I've sensed. Maybe I shouldn't be too eager to find out. At least one of them, I'm pretty certain I don't want to know about. Sensing it was bad enough.

~~So going to kill my clone, assuming I actually know about him and my Obi-Wan.~~

~~I'm also considering fucking the pervy Palpatine senseless. That will depend on how petty I'm feeling the next time I see him, though.~~

*spends a long time taking a nice, hot shower*

*eventually gets around to writing the report afterwards*

A Mission of Questionable Importance.

Sun, 22 Jan 2006 04:51:57 GMT

This place is one giant Forcedamned ice cube of a planet. At least the half I'm currently visiting is. Apparently the other side of the planet is the complete opposite; a hot, tropical paradise and popular holiday destination for the well-to-do aristocracy (which I've discovered is local slang for gangsters) from all over the galaxy. Those who know about it, anyway. I surely didn't know much before coming here. I am still left to wonder who thought I'd be the best Jedi available for this mission. To oversee political negotiations? Who are they kidding? I'm little more than a bodyguard, as the ruler whose daughter has been knocked up does everything he can to ensure the culprit, and his entire family, will burn at the stake for this. Literally. I've seen the stakes.

I've managed to soften the opinions of His Majesty, Tarr'yn VI, on this matter. It's my hope to lessen the sentence from death, to life -- of a sort. Marriage. I do not fully understand why this idea never occurred to him first. I'm beginning to suspect it's because the man who impregnated the princess (who happens to be heir to the seat of power on this planet) is considered a commoner here, though not by blood, but by circumstances. He's royalty of a different sort, from a neighbouring planet. His family fell on hard times and migrated here a few generations ago, I was told, but by rights they can lay claim to quite a bit of power of their own should they ever choose to return to their home planet. I've been researching the history of all the planets that are involved (somehow, there's 6), and their respective laws, and I'm slowly but surely forming a solid argument about why marriage would not only be taking the moral high ground, but also -- and most importantly, to Tarr'yn VI -- the more legal and popular choice. Tarr'yn VI is a man who is obsessed with details and looking good in the eyes of his people. With enough factual evidence to present to him, I'm confident this matter will be resolved peacefully.

It saddens me that the fact the princess is in love with the father of her baby, and he returns her love, isn't something Tarr'yn VI even takes into consideration.

I'm looking forward to returning to the Temple. The hardest part about this mission has been being cut off from all off-planet contact, as I wasn't permitted to bring my own ship, which has far superior communication devices than the one I have with me. Something about making the wrong impression about who the Jedi are. I'm sure they'd never guess I'm a part-time space pirate just by looking at my ~~hotass pirate~~ ship™. Well ... I suppose it is a little fancy for a nonprofit organisation such as the Jedi. Still, I could have maneuvered it into one of the ice forests and no one would've been the wiser.

I wonder what everyone's been doing without me there to keep chaos at bay. I do hope I'll actually return to the Temple, and not smoking ruins where it once stood.

Thu, 05 Jan 2006 00:52:31 GMT

Sometimes my own foolishness surprises me.

*meditates for a short time*

*changes out of the pirate gear and into his new black Jedi uniform*

*decides to head to a training salle and work out his frustration that way for a few hours*

...OOC.

Sat, 31 Dec 2005 05:04:26 GMT

Posting so I can link to this when I write Qui's entrance comment.

Fur-lined crimson cloak, chainmail cap:

What's underneath (imagine a sword sheath somewhere, and also his lightsaber is attached to his belt):

Sword, rings:

Close up of jeweled hilt and a ring:

Gallery of hotness: http://pics.livejournal.com/elegantweapon/gallery/000055p4

Thu, 29 Dec 2005 14:49:22 GMT

*decides to clean his quarters for no particular reason*

*picks up the old holostill that fell out of a stack of files, stares at it for a long moment*

*sends copies to both Obi-Wans and both Anakins in case they'd care to have it*

Tue, 27 Dec 2005 11:20:00 GMT

((Takes place days ago. But since the typist wasn't around...))

*dressed up and played Santa Claus for the Younglings, handed out gifts and lightsaber candy canes, with several older Padawans dressed up as his reindeer, sadly not including Barriss since she was sick*

*late in the night snuck around and left quite a few people some presents, the more notable ((meaning I just couldn't figure out what Qui would give everyone, but let's pretend he did give almost everyone a gift)) being...*

queereye4jedi: Everything here (the kilt conveniently in "McGregor" print), ~~Scottish~~ ~~Aslan~~ lion cufflinks, and a box to be opened at a much later time. No peeking. It may or may not be used for future plot purposes. And of course a Christmas card with a note that reads, I'm proud of the Jedi you sometimes are, and always I love the man you've become.

angsty_padawan: A hand-braided "Cat o' nine tails" whip, a "naughty schoolgirl" outfit, and a Christmas card with a note that reads, If you ever want to be properly punished...

obiwan_kaboozi: A big rock. Yes, seriously. But, when the opening on the bottom is figured out, inside he will find some individual crystals resembling these, along with a Christmas card that reads, These are called "Healing Crystals" in the Naiysz culture. They're known to offer great assistance in clearing one's mind (usually in preparation for meditation), among other things. You can discover their other various properties should you choose to use them. I promise, nothing dangerous, nothing questionable. They're believed to be capable of focusing and enhancing Force energy as well. PS, are you avoiding me?

darkside_anakin: Since he already got his gifts, all he gets is a Christmas card. ;)

rockofd00m: An assortment of Jedi robes in his size, rock-sized sexy lingerie for his girlfriend, a rock-sized little throne because the mental image of the rock sitting in a throne is amusing, and a Christmas card.

sithly_tyranny: A cactus plant decorated for Christmas, some sexy cyborg lingerie which obviously has been fitted for Grievous-sized 'borgs, and a Christmas card that reads something like, I don't hate you yet. Happy holidays.

notfromajedi: A Christmas card with a note that reads, I often take lunch at Dex's. It would be a happy coincidence indeed if we were to run into each other there. Next time's my treat. Which isn't really a gift so much as an attempt to get to know the guy, mostly for Ani's sake.

lilgreenfreak: Black robes in his size, a crate of mud from his home planet, and a Christmas card.

lil_librarian: A Christmas card with a holostill of himself in those tight leather pants she's so fond of, and a crate of mud from her home planet too.

whosyourmaster: A rare plant of questionable legality, known to produce beautiful flowers with some very interesting properties (especially when ingested in any way), and a Christmas card he could smoke.

mon_mothma: This, a copy of the holovid of her with the Twi'leks way back from Palpatine's party, and a Christmas card that reads, You're quite talented.

Wed, 21 Dec 2005 07:01:33 GMT

*has something sent to darkside_anakin's quarters*

*two nicely wrapped gifts; one containing an elaborate toolkit for a speeder, and the other a lightsaber crystal ((let's assume Qui knew the specific colour Anakin wanted and chose that))*

*also, a note:*

Anakin,
Missed seeing you at the party. Here are your gifts. You'd do better assembling the lightsaber on your own. If you need guidance and your Master isn't available, I'm always willing to help you.
Happy holidays!
Qui-Gon

Sun, 18 Dec 2005 09:55:40 GMT

cue exciting theme music

Tue, 13 Dec 2005 05:55:19 GMT

*talks with Obi-Wan about Anakin and Dooku going missing, decides to help out*

*currently waiting inside his hotass pirate ship™ with Obi-Wan, and possibly others (Mace, Yaddle?) ((*has no idea*))*

*comms the various other people involved in the ~~laughable~~ rescue mission* If we have coordinates, people, we're ready to go!

*prepares the ship to leave*

Mon, 12 Dec 2005 16:39:40 GMT

Perhaps it was a mistake returning here.

One day, maybe sooner than I'd like, Obi-Wan may find himself released from our lifebond. I foresee no great change coming over him or his life, and the Jedi in me is glad for that. I would not have him grieve me a second time. But the man I am resents that; that I might be so easily forgotten, or replaced. I'm confident I'll find my peace eventually, both as a Jedi and as a man. And I can be proud of the man that Obi-Wan will become, without the burden of regret. I'll be with him always, even if he forgets. There are still things I'd like to speak with him about before I leave here. I wonder if I shouldn't put it off like I have been.

Despite my effort to make amends, Anakin's resentment of me is still present. Not as it once was, but rooted deep enough that there is no changing it now. He holds a secret desire for me to be gone, something I doubt he's even aware of himself. Yet he also has the capacity to act on it, and it's likely only a matter of time. I care for the boy more than he'll ever understand. I would have given my life for him. If removing myself from the situation is what it takes to help turn his unhealthy obsession with Obi-Wan into something stable and positive for both of them -- so be it. I want so much for my Obi-Wan and Anakin to be happy. Even if it's not with me.

The Darkness in Anakin grows. I only hope he can overcome it before it's too late.

My one time close friend and comrade, Mace, has even resented my presence here. I'm sure in his own way he somehow blames me for Obi-Wan ending things with him. There's little I can do to right things with him if that is in fact his opinion. My absence may give him a measure of peace, and I hope that's enough.

Rohc-Kyy, if he chooses to come with me wherever I may go, can still become a Jedi with or without the approval of an old Council that may soon cease to be effective at all. Choices and actions make a Jedi, not the word of another, nor a title. I will help him understand that, either way. Maybe another Master in the Temple will be willing to train him properly if he'd rather stay.

My former Master has never truly liked me and I know now, probably never will. The minuscule part of me that's still capable of being hurt by his steadfast disapproval of me, and everything I do, can be snuffed out in time. But I'll continue to grieve for who he was before he turned from the Light ~~because I know that would piss him off~~.

I haven't kept much in my quarters. The bulk of what I own remains in my hotass pirate ship™, so at least when and if I take off, it will take only moments to prepare and leave. Physically. Emotionally, that's a different story. But when the time comes, I'll know, and will have no choice.

I'll always be a Jedi, that's a certainty I cling to when all else fails me. Wherever the will of the Force may guide me, I'll go. I wouldn't be able to live with myself knowing I didn't even attempt to right any the innumerable wrongs happening right now, everywhere I look. If this costs me my life, at least I'll have died defending what I believe in, instead of sitting idle and decaying into a second old age. I was given this second chance for a reason and I'm going to take it.

... Eventually, anyway.

*goes out shopping for his Secret Santa stuff and other assorted items*

*also checks into possible clothing options for ~~Rock-Wan Jinn~~ Rohc-Kyy*

*blah blah angst blah blah woe for the main course, with a side of abusing Force persuasion; all in all a normal day in the life of the space pirate Jedi*

Dirty XXXmas meme.

Sat, 10 Dec 2005 12:04:26 GMT

	The Twelve Days of Christmas for pirate_jinn:

Day #	Who?	What they got you

1st	lil_librarian	A creepy sexual poem that they wrote in 2nd person narration
2nd	wheezygreevy	a small, laminated card stating, 'ALL ACCESS - TO ME!'
3rd	former_queen	a confused homeless man bearing a sign that says, 'i'm a slave for you'
4th	xxxanatos	A forty pronged whip for lashing all of your friends
5th	_rock	a rainbow wig doused in pheromones
6th	queereye4jedi	crotchless panties
7th	iluvdemocracy	an invitation to the first ever zero-gravity space orgy
8th	tattooednhorny	a pop-up kama sutra
9th	mon_mothma	A tape of you showering which they filmed without your knowledge
10th	obiwan_kaboozi	most of a dead hooker
11th	lilgreenfreak	A genital piercing
12th	sithly_tyranny	A world-reknowned sexual teacher

Take this Quiz at QuizUniverse.com
( or, take the 'clean' version at QuizGalaxy.com )

ETA: *remembers to notify the Council in some way*

I'm interested in taking another Padawan. When are you guys usually out of your comas long enough to decide on these matters? Let me know. Qui-Gon.

Yet more memes.

Thu, 08 Dec 2005 09:56:23 GMT

What Will pirate_jinn Get ?

Xmas pressie predictor
Big wooly jumper knitted by	obiwan_kaboozi
Pair of Socks from	knight_tachi
Bottle of Whiskey from	mon_mothma
Cd from	whosyourmaster
Something Cuddly from	wheezygreevy
Something Intoxicating from	lil_librarian
Something Silly from	touchme_quin
Something Funny from	iluvdemocracy
Lump of coal from	queereye4jedi
Something Pretty from	lilgreenfreak
Something Shiny from	_rock
Something Naughty from	sithly_tyranny
Something Smelly from	cerulean_aayla
Something Breakable from	pirate_jinn
Something Useful from	cin_drallig
Something not useful from	tattooednhorny
The Black and Decker Tool Kit from	xxxanatos
Livejournal account from	que_serra_serra
The Make-up Bag from	gothy_offee
Stack of DVDs from	darkside_anakin
Something Geeky from	save_ferus

What Will pirate_jinn Get ?

Xmas pressie predictor
Big wooly jumper knitted by	obiwan_kaboozi
Pair of Socks from	whosyourmaster
Bottle of Whiskey from	sithly_tyranny
Cd from	mon_mothma
Something Cuddly from	wheezygreevy
Something Intoxicating from	que_serra_serra
Something Silly from	angsty_padawan
Something Funny from	darkside_anakin
Lump of coal from	tattooednhorny
Something Pretty from	save_ferus
Something Shiny from	former_queen
Something Naughty from	pirate_jinn
Something Smelly from	lil_librarian
Something Breakable from	queereye4jedi
Something Useful from	touchme_quin
Something not useful from	gothy_offee
The Black and Decker Tool Kit from	_rock
Livejournal account from	mistress_padme
The Make-up Bag from	notfromajedi
Stack of DVDs from	cerulean_aayla
Something Geeky from	cin_drallig

Username:

Made by _imran_ and beyond_bananas.
Hosted at Memeland

Is my former Master trying to tell me something?

*apparently going to buy sex toys and porn for himself*

Aw, and ~~the more sane and less gay~~ Obi-Wan really must want me to have a big knitted wooly jumper.

Wed, 07 Dec 2005 01:08:25 GMT

Thank Force (and thank Mace) the body switching problem seems to be solved. I can only imagine the sort of trouble they'd have gotten up to if this had continued much longer.

The rock is safe ((assuming Mace gave it back?)), back in his little rock home, and his girlfriend should be arriving within the week. Perhaps I need to look into getting it a bigger rock home now. I suppose the set-up can go in the spare bedroom, unless I take another Padawan.

Now there's a frightening thought.

Oh Great Cthulhu!

I have been an extremely busy devotee this year.

In May, I prepared an ocean voyage to R'lyeh (200 points). In March, I defiled the grave of that traitor, Lovecraft (90 points). In February, I made a burnt offering to the Dead Dreamer (100 points). Yesterday, I rammed a ship into you (sorry Cthulhu!) (-1000 points). In June, I called down the wrath of Yog-Sothoth upon sithly_tyranny (65 points). In April, I wore an Elder Sign (-10 points).

In short, I have been very bad (-555 points) and deserve to be sent to sleep with the Deep Ones.

Your humble and obedient servant,
pirate_jinn

Submit your own plea to Cthulhu!

Holonet amusement.

Tue, 06 Dec 2005 01:23:26 GMT

Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

This year I've been busy!

Last Thursday I put gum in whosyourmaster's hair (-12 points). Last Friday I helped wheezygreevy across the street (6 points). In August I caught a purse-snatcher who stole queereye4jedi's purse (30 points). In June I helped rockofd00m see the light (8 points). Last Saturday I bought porn for lilgreenfreak (-10 points).

Overall, I've been nice (22 points). For Christmas I deserve a red Radio-Flyer wagon!

Sincerely,
pirate_jinn

I was simply saving my gum on your head, Mace. You know, like I used to.

Stop the sex, stop the stink, yo.

Sat, 03 Dec 2005 05:19:54 GMT

*sends a Temple wide notice*

If you are currently sexually active or plan to be in the future, you must refrain. The Temple has developed a terrible odor (wonder no more what it is you're smelling) and the ruckus keeps non participants awake at night.

Master Yoda will be more than happy to display a Shenon VII mating ritual for all to see in the Room of a Thousand Fountains if the rampant intimate relations continue. I doubt attendance will be optional.

Don't shoot the messenger. I offered to import industrial cleaning droids, no charge.

We all know none of you will actually stop, so start cleaning up after yourselves and break out the incense and scented candles. Come see me personally if you're interested in extremely discounted goods, including an assortment of gags to help muffle the noise.

*goes to talk to his "sources" about importing the cleaning droids anyway*

Fri, 02 Dec 2005 01:52:10 GMT

I trust Obi-Wan's instincts more than I trust a blood test. Something is very wrong here. How could one fake a blood test? Use someone else's blood? How? Mace is competent, he'd notice. He'd sense something. He'd have to. We place too much importance on Midichlorian counts, regardless. They don't reveal much about a person.

I will not simply sit here and do nothing, and I can't do this alone. It would be suicide. But I also can't ask anyone to risk their life for me on a suspicion and a hunch. And I know that's how it would be, especially with my Obi-Wan, or Ani. For me. Not for the safety of the Republic, the entire galaxy. But for me. That isn't a burden I'm willing to bear. I need the backing of the Council and I know I won't receive it. Maybe not even with irrefutable proof of what I feel must be true.

But the Jedi also may all be slaughtered in one way or another. More than we have been. What could anyone possibly do? What can I do, before it's too late?. . .

*deeply conflicted and frustrated, paces the corridors of the Temple for a while, mulling over his thoughts and coming to no decisive conclusion*

*decides to attempt meditation in one of the currently unoccupied indoor gardens, where it's quiet and peaceful and he's not likely to be disturbed*

Sat, 26 Nov 2005 05:41:29 GMT

Sometimes I have to wonder if it's something I said or did that has most of my Jedi line hating me and wanting me to die again. Then I come to my senses and remember they're crazy and evil and none of it could possibly be my fault.

There's just no pleasing some people.

ETA: http://www.dooku.net/

*sets it to play Tarzan Boy in the background, amuses self for hours*

Fri, 25 Nov 2005 06:27:12 GMT

Anakin is a lot more competent than he's been given credit for. He single-handedly ensured the success of our rescue attempt. I'm very impressed. I don't know what I would have done if he hadn't gone with me. I told him I was proud of him, and he seemed pleased. I think we've really made progress in becoming friends.

Instead of laying all the blame on Obi-Wan when he's coherent enough to understand, as I might've done in the past, I'll try talking to him. Explain what happened, and find out his side of the story, since that's still a mystery to me. Maybe this way, he will be more willing to learn from his mistakes. Maybe it wasn't his fault at all. Although, wandering off like that ... No one could have made him. Not even my former Master. Could he?

~~Dooku is a good kisser. There. I said, er, wrote it. Ugh. I feel dirty.~~

Qui-Gon Jinn, pirate-Jedi.

Mon, 21 Nov 2005 10:47:11 GMT

FUCKING JEDI RESPONSIBILITY! I PASSED UP THE OPPORTUNITY TO HAVE A THREESOME WITH OBI-WAN AND XANATOS IN FAVOUR OF CALMING DOWN A VERY DISTRAUGHT, MURDEROUS ANAKIN. WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO MY PRIORITIES? SCREW SAVING THE JEDI FROM MY BOY WONDER, I WANT SEX! ARRRGHHH!

I'm so becoming Dooku's Sith apprentice one day. ~~Anakin and I will rule the galaxy together.~~

In related news, ~~Anakin's sexy when he's angry~~ Obi-Wan makes a very sexy woman. He'd make a sexy anything. And Xani is pure evil ~~I'm quite proud~~, never a dull moment when he's around. It seems we've both been accepted back into the Jedi Order as well. Man, they must be desperate for more cannon fodder.

Ani and I have reached an agreement to be friends. I'm hoping to help him regain some emotional stability. And instead of wallowing in my regret and misery, I'm going to try to help give Obi-Wan the same, however I can. I hope he's receptive. Only a decade or two late, but better late than never. Or I suppose I could send him to that Sith Lord Zabrak who's wandering around the temple playing counselor.

So, I have a goal: break the curse that causes my line of Jedi to be batshit insane. Or if I fail I'll run off to resume my pirating. Curse, pirating ... why am I suddenly compelled to call myself Jack, and Obi-Wan Will?

Sat, 19 Nov 2005 10:58:22 GMT

My return to the temple clearly caused the universe to temporarily shut down.

Pirate Jinn saves the day.

Fri, 18 Nov 2005 06:27:58 GMT

*back at the Jedi temple in his own old quarters after ~~having a dance off~~ dueling with Xanatos, reclaiming Obi-rock, and unintentionally introducing Quinlan to some of the strongest liquor this side of Hoth*

*lets Quin have the bed*

*sits at a table, stroking Obi-rock* You mean you don't know where your own body is? *suddenly feels a migraine coming on*

Shortly after getting Obi-Wan back into his body...

*leaves Obi-Wan to catch up with Anakin and any others who show up, heads back to his own quarters carrying the evil rock trapped in a bedsheet*

Thu, 17 Nov 2005 09:53:03 GMT

*saunters -- or, more accurately, sways and stumbles along -- through the temple, singing a mostly nonsensical song in his (usually) pleasing baritone, slurring the few discernible words there are*

*worth note is that he's decked out completely as a space pirate now, predominantly black clothing close-fitting in all the right places, blaster (holstered) and lightsaber both attached to his belt, bizarre things braided into his hair, and Obi-Wan's Padawan braid somehow fastened around his wrist, looped a few times*

*even intoxicated, able to use the Force to locate and head in his Obi-Wan's general direction, still singing drunkenly*